Wednesday, December 22, 2010

They have arrived

Wednesday December 15th at 12:00pm in the afternoon Madison Elizabeth made her big debut into the world. She weighted 4lbs. 4oz and was 16 and 3/4 inches long. And one minute later followed her little sister Madelynne Mae weighing in at 3lbs. 6oz and was 16 inches long. True to their form in my belly Madison was spunky crying making it known she was not happy and Madelynne laid on the table wide eyed and just took in the world around her. The littles were taken into the NICU after we got to take a quick peak at them. They had to go on Cpap but within a few days they were both taken off and breaking in regular air on their own. Aunt Brandi and Daddy got to be in the room while the c-section took place. It took about 45 minutes all together. Davis was in the waiting room and everyone else waited patiently for the news.
We were beyond surprised that we had two little girls because mommy thought for sure she saw boy parts in a sonogram. Mommy is still in shock that I gave birth to two beautiful little girls.
Mimi flew in to help take care of everyone on Friday and Papa Wayne and Momma Stacy got here on Sunday to help out as well. But Aunt Kathy, Uncle Cooper,  Greg and Alicia were the ones that got us through the entire month of mommy being on bedrest at the hospital. The saying it takes a village has never been more true in my whole life. Daddy and I could not have managed life without any of them these last few weeks.
While on bedrest mommy made a new friend. Her name is Jill and she was one of our many nurses that took such good care of us in the antepartum part of our stay. I am excited because her husband and daddy seem to have lots in common aka their love for trucks.
Your brother has been one of the best troopers during this time of craziness. He has been shuffled from one house to another so that daddy could come up and help take care of me. He is so excited to help take care of you. The saddest thing for mommy is that he hasn't been able to hold you or see you. He has only experienced you through the window of the NICU but seriously it made his day. There is so much more to say about each of you but for today we will leave it at this we love you and my heart is so full right now. We love you littles and are so glad you are ok.

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Baby Thoughts

Growing up I don't remember dreaming about a lot of things that maybe other girls did. I never really thought about what my future husband would be like or dreamed of a fairytale wedding. I was never big into make-up, clothes, or decorating things. I guess you could say I was just all around a tom boy. But the one thing I do remember dreaming about and alot was having children. I remember watching the Baby Story on TLC every single day. I remember the first baby sitting job I ever had. I remember I couldn't wait until my baby cousins came to town so I could help take "care" of them or when my mom's best friend had a baby. I loved changing diapers and picking out clothes for them and getting them dressed. In high school amongst hanging out with my friends I always had many families I baby sat for. Now those kids are graduating high school soon, driving cars and going to prom. It blows my mind. In my world I always assumed if and when I got married I would have a house full of kids. I would watch the Baby Story and cry because I could not wait to be a mommy.  I couldn't wait to be pregnant and see my belly grow and feel a baby kick. I have spent years looking at all the baby equipment that has come out over the years. My job pretty much since I graduated high school has been taking care of children in some way shape or form. I started collecting baby clothes and cribs way before we had children just assuming that because I wanted them they would come.
Cliff and I decided shortly after we moved to Buffalo to start trying to have a baby. Wow that seems like a life time ago. I look back over our journey of trying to have kids and what a journey it has been. Zacky blessed our lives beyond anything we could ever have hoped for. Then 4 years later here I sit in a hospital bed waiting as patiently as possible for our babies to be born. It blows my mind.
Many years ago I gave up the dream I had as a little girl to have my own babies. I knew that God wanted us to adopt and so we did but I also knew that with all our infertility issues that us getting pregnant was probably out of the question. I sat on a boat in the middle of the Bahamas on a missions trip with an amazing group of teenagers and decided that God had to be in control of us having children or it could very possibly ruin me. I didn't want to spend the rest of my life miserable at other people's baby showers or crying every time I got my period or loosing it when a friend told me she was pregnant. I knew and trusted that God had a plan for us. We never dreamed we would have the money to do infertility treatment and I never thought it was for me. But then when my dad passed away we decided that it would be a great way to honor him. And if dad could pick anything in the world for us to do with the money we got it would be to put it towards growing our family. So we did and WOW here we are having twins. Yes even at 32 weeks and 5 days I am still in awe of this almost every minute of the day. How did we get so lucky with Zack and now our littles. I just don't know. God is so good. We are so blessed.
As I sit here tonight in my little hospital room thinking of what sex they are and making sure I really like the names we have picked out so far I am sad that my dad is not here with us. I know that my daddy is in Heaven tonight waiting just as patiently as we are to see their little faces. I miss him a lot tonight and just want to be able to tell him thank you. Because of a really shitty situation it has allowed my biggest childhood dream to become a reality. I miss you dad every day and love you beyond measure. Thank you for our littles!